In which the reptiles battle a mild form of schizophrenia ...

The HUNsters were today showing off a mild form of schizophrenia, with the suggestion that bombing women and children with a Hornet was a way to show off dinky di hearts ...

And then there was the latest grotesque offence committed against the English language:

A humanitarian dividend! No wonder Twitter irritates the reptiles so as the ghost of Orwell flutters in the breeze...

And then there was a tidy smack down ...

The pond just loves the way that Twitter irritates the reptiles so ...

Then there was Paul Sheehan's splendid suggestion to start a war with Turkey ...

Oh he didn't really mean Turkey, but as with magic water and sourdough he really doesn't have much of a clue ...

And others wondered whether Tony Abbott did ...

Well as already celebrated on the pond, Tony Abbott only seems to know three word slogans:

And this meme was doing the rounds, stripped of its original party affiliation to make the point cleanly and clearly:

Majestic.

But as always with the pond, there has to be some substantial thinking at work after the twittering glories have exploded in the sky like an Oscar Wilde rocket, and for that the pond always turns to the reliable reptiles.

For this we need to know the story so far.

Only two days ago the reptiles were celebrating the way that Tony Abbott stood firm and refused to increase the intake of refugees; then a day ago the reptiles thought Tony Abbott had entirely missed the political point.

Now the chief editorialist from the Surry Hills hipster bunker is ecstatic:

Yes, it's the HUNsters front page two-pronged response, but now with added bonus prong.

Let us read more closely, let us celebrate the Australian way:

Phew. So a few bombers are going to return the country to safety and security, except it's a plan that lacks clarity, and instead of returning anything it will merely contain, and ... schizophrenia anyone?

Perhaps we need a cartoon to lighten the impact of all that incipient schizophrenia. A Moir will do nicely:

And now, let's return to the reptiles, only pausing to marvel at the way the military mission has been worked out, the purpose and the aims solid, and the timeline made clear, running anywhere from the planes being home by Xmas, three or four years hence, or perhaps an Xmas a decade hence, or perhaps an Xmas at the twelfth of never ... and remember shameless pandering and exaggerations must be the norm, never the exception:

The Levant. How charming. What a quaint, but entirely appropriate, colonial word to apply to the situation.

You can take the reptiles out of the leather chairs and away from their ports, but you can't take the Colonel Blimps out of their clubs ...

And now the pond should make a personal note about the angry Sydney Anglicans. 

It's the business of the pond to routinely mock the angry Anglicans, yet recently Glenn Davies - unlike the Catholics - struck a grace note and in one piece actually acknowledged the parable of the Samaritan. 

Fair's fair, and Davies said the right thing by ruling out religion as a criterion for selection, but then the Anglicans actually read the bible, unlike Catholics, who have always preferred a decent set of indulgences.

Now with only a few more steps, the pond and the angry Anglicans might end up on the same page, perhaps somewhere around Gosford. 

We just need a few more tweaks to the message: